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Living In My Car: First Time BLM Camping

(April 9, 2019)

Video Transcript:

The wind is pretty intense right now.

I’ve been getting alerts about a dust storm warning.

So that sounds pretty rad, can’t wait to see what the hell that’s like.

It’s actually really dusty out here, I think I can feel it in my eyeballs.

Anyway, I’m just blown away.

I pulled in kinda late and the campground host was off duty, and the sign said to park and then talk to the host tomorrow.

So I did, and I admit I was really nervous because I’ve never done this on BLM land. The last place as a National Forest.

With wind like this, I’m gonna have to get out my little fuzzy microphone, but I don’t know if it works. I tried it once and it seemed to work. I’ll try it again.

Hell yeah, livin’ the dream baby!

They weren’t kidding about that dust storm, man, the wind is like high.

This should be pretty entertaining tonight, probably be a really windy one.

I like wind.

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Tripping Out On Arizona Beauty

(April 9, 2019)

Video Transcript:

Dude. Look how fuckin’ beautiful this is.

Look at that shit.

That’s INSANE.

Look how stunning this is.

This is fucking stunning.

And look at those people up there, look at those houses.

They’re living the fucking dream over there.

This is AMAZING.

Look at this, look how fuckin’ gorgeous this is.

Am I right??

Look at this.

Wow dude.

The drive through Kingman and Lake Havasu City is like the chillest drive I’ve ever taken.

Leagues beyond chill. Just stunning.

There’s a ton of people around here too.

This area is amazing, it feels really good too.

It’s pretty warm, the heat is really nice. It’s like 90 something degrees but it’s not bad, probably because of the breeze by the water.

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Kingman Arizona WalMart OMG!?

(April 9, 2019)

Video Transcript:

So I just pulled into the WalMart in Kingman and I’m so fucking stoked.

This is like a dream come true, to be in Kingman?

I’ve wanted to come here for YEARS.

Kingman is nice, I dig the vibes, it’s good.

I mean, so far.

I hope I don’t get proven wrong, but…

So far?

Dude.

Kingman is the shit.

Did I park straight enough?

I feel like my parking skills have like, gone downhill.

I dunno, it’s fine.

So I’m here to stock up on water and some other supplies before I go to the camping spot.

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Morning Campsite Walk and Chat

(April 9, 2019)

Video Transcript:

So my camping spot today is further in than my last one was.

There were like 4 RVs, man you know I gotta say… RVs look like a freakin’ pain.

They had an RV on levelers, and it seems like a huge hassle. I think vans are pretty much the only way to go.

And this my view.

I’m so comfortable.

To able to go to these amazing places and just pass through…

You know, we’re not staying forever.

If you spent 2 weeks at one of these campsites, that’s nothing compared to what you spend living in a house in one location.

You’re just passing through and then you’re onto the next place that has the amazing scenery that just gives you pause and makes you think, “Wow, I’m so blessed and grateful to be here right now.”

Little morning walk around the campsite.

It’s super beautiful.

Lastnight, it was colder than I’m okay with. If it gets below about 48 degrees, I’m not cool with that, that’s not okay.

Gonna be going a little bit further south, towards warmer night time temperatures.

I hate to leave here cuz it’s so pretty, stunningly beautiful. And it’s not even gonna get up to 60 degrees during the day for the next few days, and I don’t want that.

My feet get cold, and I’ve got footwarmers, but if I need to use my footwarmers, it’s too damn cold. That’s not what I came here for.

The main thing that’s kept me away from Arizona for the most part is that every time I’ve come this way, it’s been a really hot time of year and there’s no way to sleep in your vehicle when it’s that hot.

That’s why I went straight to Arizona first thing so I could be here and enjoy it before it got too hot.

I’m really excited about heading a little bit further south. This has been a great first boondocking carcamping experience. I couldn’t have asked for a better introduction to what this is all about.

It’s nice, it’s just that you’ve got to move with the weather.

I think I might eat a little bit of something.

So for breakfast I’m gonna be having this…

(holds up Chunky’s Split Pea & Ham Soup)

laughs

Oh my God. It’s like the baby food all over again.

What I really appreciate about this is that it’s nice and mushy.

drinks water

If it was warm and had about 50 times more salt in it, it’d be better.

Well, that’s not… good. That’s not very good.

But I did get a couple other flavors so I think those will probably be better.

It’s not that it’s cold, it’s just that it’s not good. I should have known. I kinda did know, like when I picked it up I was like agh… let’s do it. Let’s do it anyway.

It’s amazing how much trash gets made.

Well anyway, that’s breakfast done for me.

So now I’m gonna do a little bit of work and focus on making it to my next camping destination.

I think it’s worth being a little bit hotter during the day in order to be warmer at night.

The heat of the day though…

I dunno how I’m actually gonna deal with that.

I’ve got a tent so if I could get somewhere I could just pitch a tent…

Which I’m sure I’d regret pitching a tent because it’s a pop-up tent and if I can’t twist it just right to get it to collapse back onto itself…

Agh my God.

I also have a camping chair.

I have one of those little inflatable camping mattresses.

I could just lay on the ground and lay on that.

Shit could get weird. For sure.

I’d rather just pitch a tent and put the little inflatable mattress in that.

But I dunno, one of the other or both is probably gonna happen. I dunno how this is gonna work out.

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Drinking Pedialyte At Flagstaff WalMart

(April 8, 2019)

Video Transcript:

There’s almost nothing better than this. I’m trying to think of things that are better, and I’m not coming up with much. It’s like after 8AM so it’s kind of getting a little bit warmer in here now, but it just feels so good.

contented sigh

Here I am at the Flagstaff WalMart, it’s about the nicest WalMart ever. It’s got covered parking, that’s some crazy shit. I fit in, I’ll just put it that way.

I’m hella, mega fuckin’ stoked about this right now. I went in there dressed like a pure and total hippie. People were turning and looking and smiling at me. And some people just thought I was weird, just another one of the crazy people who are around Flagstaff. If you’re a crazy person around Flagstaff, I’m not hating but come on, it’s true.

One of the important things I got was some ~Pedialyte.

Let me just get down here and fuckin’ talk to you right now, okay?

So I literally just turned 29, and I got some Pedialyte because I’m thirsty in ways that are just not even good.

But right now, I feel like I need it. I feel like I was divinely guided to get this Pedialyte, dude.

“Not for people with galactosemia.” Jeez, I hope I don’t have galactosemia, whatever the fuck that is.

This little kid has a bitchin’ mohawk dude, like he has an actual legitimate mohawk and he’s like 2 or something. That is so cute.

You guys, I lost my shit. It’s lost. Let me just show you the normal thing first, let me just break the ice with this…

(holds up ~Fritos Mild Cheddar)

I got this and some chips. So okay that’s the normal thing, but this is where we really deviate…

Okay so this is baby food…

(holds up ~BeechNut Naturals Beets, Pears & Pomegranate)

I know, I know. I know.

It’s pointless. There was no reason, totally uncalled for. There’s no reason for this. But I’m Annie. And I do some weird shit that makes literally no sense.

So this is the OTHER jar of baby food.

I don’t know, okay listen, I don’t have the answers for you, I don’t.

Sweet potatoes.

I know it, I know.

And this is the last one.

These little jars. If I had a baby, I’d probably be saving every single jar. I’d probably make my own baby food, first of all.

This guy’s about to pull in and see me eating baby food.

You know, the thing about mountains is that they kinda just look the same, don’t they?

The only difference in mountains is the tallness of the mountains.

Starting to feel kinda hydrated right now.

Here he comes back with the cart. Does he have somebody in there right now or something?

(holds up sweet potatoes baby food)

I don’t know about myself right now dude. Ew, this looks runny. I’m not kidding.

I’m just thinking about my life right now. Some shit’s giving me some deep fucking thoughts.

To be completely real with you, it’s like really fucking good.

It’s almost flooding my body with life.

I feel kinda fucked up a lot of the time, I don’t feel super duper well a lot of the time so…

It’s giving me this strange feeling of life force or something.

(holds up Pineapple, Pear & Avocado)

Avocado, like really? That’s weird.

This smells like wall paint.

Okay girl, that ain’t cute. Don’t nobody’s baby gonna want that…

laughs

Ain’t nobody’s baby gonna want that! That’s some nasty shit!

So I also got some kind of normal-ish food, I got these…

(holds up ~NutriGrain Strawberry Cereal Bars)

I love them.

(holds up ~Skintimate Berry Shaving Cream)

I got a travel size shaving cream…

nods

You’re gonna find out.

(holds up ~Fiorucci Prosciutto & Mozzarella Panino)

I forgot about this. Um, yes, please, get in my face right now.

I would have not eaten any of that shit if I hadn’t forgotten about this…

Okay I still would have eaten it because I was obsessing on the idea.

(eating in zenlike bliss)

So this dude next to me in this creepy white van, well it’s not creepy it’s actually really nice, but he got a cart full of water. That’s my kinda dude right there. If you’ve got the water, you’re my man.

Kinda makes me feel like my water supply is inadequate. It’s literally not though, I’ve got 3 brand new jugs and half of another jug.

I dunno what kinda car it is, it’s like a red sports car. He’s livin’ the dream. Not really into cars…

Here’s my deal. There’s one kind of vanity car that I think is cool. Maserati.

That’s it.

Couldn’t care less. I don’t care about Maserati. Couldn’t care less about it. But if I was to choose one and say that’s cool, it’s Maserati.

My rule on cars is I don’t give a fuck about cars, what I care about is can you sleep in it?

Cuz if you can’t sleep in it…

What in the fuck is it good for?

This guy next to me totally lives in his van dude, cuz he didn’t even leave.

This old dude parked behind me just got out and I swear he totally looks like Billy Corgan.

Hm, this is really interesting. Really interesting people here.

Also got…

(holds up ~Suave For Men 3 in 1)

Shampoo, conditioner, bodywash.

So I was going through the travel size aisle and literally all they had was conditioner. There was no shampoo. This was the only thing that looked like shampoo.

I got some soup, which I will absolutely not be heating up before I eat it, just so you know.

(holds up ~Campbell’s Chunky Baked Potato with Steak & Cheese Soup)

This is huge, I don’t know what I was thinking.

I got this one and then this one…

(holds up ~Campbell’s Chunky Split Pea Ham & Old Fashioned Vegetable Beef Soup)

Cuz all I had in here was beans, salmon, pineapple, peanut butter and crackers, and that’s it. And that’s plenty. But…

I just kinda felt like it might be nice to have just a little bit of variety.

I got a bitchin’ hat. My other hat was straw as well but I kept it in the car probably about 7 months or something like that and it was literally falling to pieces. Like sharp hay pieces everywhere. So I just got this one and threw the other one away.

There are some things I wanna do here because this WalMart WiFi is FAST and I’d kinda like to utilize that again, but I dunno. We’ll see how I feel about it.

So I’m sitting at the Flagstaff WalMart and I’ve been here for a while, I’ve kinda lost count. And I’ve kinda noticed an unsavory element. There are people back there who are coughing and sneezing, and there’s like this weed smell wafting through the air. They sound sick and shit.

I’m pretty much ready to get the fuck outta here. It’s a nice store but now I see why all the workers come out here to collect up the carts and they’ve got these looks on their faces…

They’re like scowling and looking at everybody because some weird stuff goes down here.

I like Flagstaff so far as I’ve seen, but it is what it is, right?

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Solo Female Traveler Tips

(April 8, 2019)

Video Transcript:

So my #1 safety tip for solo female travelers is…

To just look kinda fucked up.

You know what I mean?

It’s not about winning a beauty contest out here, we’re not out here to look good.

We’re out here to live life.

And have experiences in the world.

I’m not trying to say purposely attempt to look ugly, but you’re honestly better of erring on the side of homeliness rather than trying to show off your looks.

You gotta be smart about it.

I feel like I’m pretty safe because I’m just making no attempt whatsoever to be attractive on any level. The time for that is over in life, that’s done. Everything is so much more serious than that.

When you see that life IS fragile and short…

I mean it’s not “short” necessarily, but it’s KINDA short in the scheme of things in millions of years on this planet.

Life is short, but it’s more so fragile than short…

When you see that and you realize that and it truly hits home with you, it changes your fucking life and you’re just like you know what, fuck everything. Just fuck everything. I’m done living a less than completely, totally honest life.

Solo female travelers, just don’t try to be attractive.

Only do that if you’re in a safe place, if you’re with people who you actually know and you’re going out for dinner or whatever, fine.

But when you’re alone, don’t do it. Don’t try to look attractive. There’s no reason to.

If people only like you because you make an effort to be attractive, they don’t like the real you. You don’t want people in your life who don’t like the real you.

Anyway, sermon’s over.

So I’m here at sunrise, it’s like 6AM. At my first legitimate camping spot, and literally nothing happened. So that’s freakin’ awesome. Nothing happened, everything was fine.

laughs

I just need to find about 20 other places where I can do this and then I’ll be able to basically just live this way. That’s the goal. The goal is to not live in a house, because when you live in a house it’s like you’re living in a climate controlled box, and you’re just a piece of meat rotting away. Just slow rot.

And I’ve found that traveling this way, living like this, it increases your perception of time by like roughly three times as much.

I left a week ago today, and it feels like I’ve been gone for probably like 3 weeks. Honestly it feels timeless.

The amount of experiences that I have had just so far…

A week into this?

It completely changes your perception of life. It makes life longer.

It’s cold right now, my tripod handle is cold right now, the camera is foggy. It’s cold.

And that feels good.

If I’m in a house and the heater’s on and it gets cold like this, my nose gets so dry. It makes me have a headache and I wake up feeling sick. And I don’t feel like that. I’m cold, but I don’t feel sick or dried out like a raisin.

It’s so much better to live closer to the elements, to expose yourself to those changes in temperature.

I recommend and encourage everybody, especially if you’re drawn to it, try to do this. Try to attempt to live a mobile lifestyle. Even if you can only do it on the weekends or for a day every now and then, do it and see if it makes you happy and makes you feel good.

And if it does, work toward making that your life. It’s okay to do it.

You have to plan and learn and become educated about how to do it. I’ve spent a good two years solid planning and thinking and learning about this. And now I’m attempting to do this forever, basically.

I have a spirit of wanderlust, I’m not necessarily the most realistic person in the world.

I will literally leave to go and do this, a “roadtrip”, with the intent of it being “forever”.

And we all know about forever. Forever is kind of an arbitrary concept, nothing is forever.

Nevertheless, I’ll set out with that intention in my heart. Of just forever living this roaming kind of life.

And that’s an experience I wanna have. I wanna do that.

It all makes sense in hindsight. Eventually you understand why you want to do the things that you want to do.

But the important thing is that you just do it. Because you’ll always be curious and if you don’t do it, you’ll regret it.

Stop waiting for society to give you permission to break free, because they won’t ever give you permission.

Misery loves company. They don’t want you to be free. But you can be free, if this is what you want.

So I encourage you.

You got this.

Solo female, solo dude. Whatever. Couples. Just get a van big enough for both of you.

I’m glad I’m solo to be honest.

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Girls Just Wanna Car Camp

(April 8, 2019)

Video Transcript:

So I stayed here at Motel 6 in Winslow, Arizona lastnight, and it was fucking great. I had to get some work done. Since the camping spot I was originally gonna go to fell thru for reasons I didn’t expect, I was like you know what, I need to just get a hotel and do some important work and plan where I’m gonna go.

I think I found an area, and I’m nervous. It seems like a perfect place. It’s kinda hard to find one of those, for me and my standards and what I’m looking for particularly. It’s not that easy. So I’m heading there today and I just don’t know what to expect, really. It’s gonna be interesting.

Here I am in the spot. It seems kind of amazing?

I didn’t pull very far in. I just saw this spot with the tree and it seemed kind of perfect. It’s just very different for me. I feel like I need to position my car a little better.

The idea that I can just stay here…

The only thing is there are spots where locals come and break bottles and shit.

This is a bitchin’ fuckin’ tree dude.

If I wanted to, I could just stand beside this tree every day, for 2 weeks.

You know what’s interesting is the cell phone signal out here is bomb. I’m checking my phone whilst making a video, I’m so rude.

As far as camping goes, this is a bitchin’ spot as long as it doesn’t get weird at night. Like if 50 pickup trucks pull up in here and start rolling kegs around and shit, that would be bad.

But legitimately, that shit at the hotel lastnight with those chicks. They were lovers or something, it was a weird crazy chick fight that was based around one chick being hurt because the other chick… I dunno, it sounded like a lover’s quarrel going on.

And, there were dudes also yelling.

laughs

Outside in the parking lot. Where my car was. And I was like… you can’t necessarily safely come up out of your hotel at like 3 or 4AM or whatever with your bags and shit all freaked out without people being like, “Oh, what are you doing?” Potentially, there’s literally a violent escalation going on. You can’t just walk out in the middle of that shit.

But when you’re in a vehicle, there’s the anonymity thing going on, no one knows who’s in it and you can just drive off.

Of course there’s the scenarios of them slicing your tires and all that horror movie bullshit, but I’ll drive that fucker out on rims until it blows up, you know what I mean?

I can’t believe that it’s possible to do this. I can’t believe I’m in Arizona right now. I lust after Arizona. Somebody who lives in Arizona posted a picture that was like a full moon starlit night sky a few months ago and I was like, “Man, I want that. I want that Arizona night.”

And I’m here.

This is the way it works.

You see it, you envision it, you feel emotion over it, and it happens.

It’d be nice if I could have truck plates that don’t have any state on it. Kentucky, people are gonna drive by it like “WTF?” What if somebody hates Kentucky and wants to torch that shit? My mind.

I need to be in a peaceful place. I’m super tense, my entire body is so tense. It’s hurting me physically.

I recorded some information about some of the things I’ve experienced lately, but it’s kind of sensitive so I don’t think I’ll share it. Suffice it to say, I’m not out here doing this for no reason. In a sense, I’m running for my life. Do or die. It’s really strange. It didn’t happen to me the way I hear about it happening to a lot of people. I was forced to it in other ways.

So I’ve got everything sort of arranged in my car.

Just laying in my car, I’ve got all the window coverings up.

I’ve been blessed with an absurdly comfortable bed and it’s about 6 inches of memory foam. That’s about that it takes to be truly comfortable if you’re in your car and you can fold your seats down and put something over that. You need to put thick foam, don’t skimp.

We spend so much of our lives sleeping, we need to be comfortable doing it. It’s definitely the most important aspect of living in your vehicle. You’ve got to have a comfortable bed.

I should probably be outside right now enjoying the beautiful day but it was such a monumental feat for me to even get here and feel like it was doable that I’m just gonna relax. That’s what this is about for me.

Relaxing and trying to learn how to loosen my body and the intensity and the tension. I wanna live life at a slower pace and just don’t be so uptight basically. It’s not healthy to be like that.

I’ve changed into some comfortable, crazy pants and taken my shoes off, and I don’t wanna put ’em back on.

Where are my shoes? Here’s one of ’em…

(holds shoe up to camera)

They’re kinda like colorful and stuff, they’re sneakers.

Wearing socks is fuckin’ bullshit, I don’t wanna do it anymore. There’s like no way to wash them.

I mean obviously I know how to wash them, I devised a method of a washbucket and all that shit, but I don’t wanna have to do that.

I wanna figure out how to do this as simply as possible.

I’ll probably mostly wear the same thing.

I brought a lot of shit with me, it’s ridiculous. Do I regret it at this juncture? No. I like everything that I have in here. I have something for every occasion and need that there could be, and I like that.

Cuz when you’re out here and the continental United States is your oyster…

I believe in minimalism but I also think it’s good to have a little bit of everything so that you can sort of change your life on a dime. Just be somebody different if you need to be.

It feels good. Not gonna lie, it feels really really good.

This was what I wanted. I wanted to come and find a place to just stop and stay. And honestly just like, lay here.

It’s a weird feeling when you do kinda get there, you know what I mean? Here I am, and now I’m laying here in my car. What do I do? That’s just it. Stop asking yourself what to do every minute of every day. Just fuckin’ relax.

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Monument Valley

(April 7, 2019)

Video Transcript:

Here I am and I’m pretty close to Monument Valley. I’m like 90 miles away from it.

Just got into Utah. I’m gonna make it on to Monument Valley and after that I plan to get into Arizona, and it’ll be my first attempt at finding somewhere to camp. Somewhere I can just park and I don’t have to leave for a hot minute. That’s what I’m looking for. I just wanna park and just stay there.

There are a lot of places in AZ to do it, but I’m gonna go to the first one that I know of and just try it out. But if I can find a place to just park it up… it’s on.

The only other way that I know how to do it is to keep moving and just stay at interstate rest areas. But there’s no slow pace in that. That’s fast paced. I wanna get somewhere and just stay there for a while and see how I feel about it, because that’s how I’ve done it in the past… just fast paced paced blow through every state, and I don’t wanna do that. It’s not sustainable. I wanna find some place to park it up, so that’s my mission.

(panning across rock formations)

Check it out. Stunningly beautiful. One of my favorite places in the USA.

This is the Bluff area of Utah. I mean just look at this. Look at it.

It’s fuckin’ amazing.

It’s mindbending. That’s the term I always use. Seriously.

Monument Valley is a special place. The first time I went there, I cried at how unbelievably beautiful that it is.

It’s a piece of plastic. I thought it was a piece of quartz, I was like, “Holy shit, it’s an arrowhead!” But no, it’s literally plastic. Anyways.

(shows rock formation in distance)

Dunno what that is, but I like it.

(panning around view)

Great time of year to be here.

And over toward that way, you can still see some of the snow topped mountains.

It’s worth it to travel around and adventure and come to these places. Everybody needs to do it.

Looks like it might be raining over there.

This is the classic shot that you see of the road that leads to Monument Valley.

This is where people notoriously lock it up in the middle of the road and get out and take pictures of themselves in the middle of the road.

To live somewhere like this, I’m sure you’d get used to it like everything else. It’s all relative.

(shows broken alcohol bottle on ground)

Look. People like to have a good time back in here dude. Crazy shit’s gone on in here, you can believe that.

I prefer the view of Monument Valley at a distance. At the park, of course it’s gorgeous, but for me the real thrill of it is to drive through and see it from afar. That’s what I like to do.

I think it’s fucked up how they have all these National Parks sectioned off, you can’t get in there unless you pay a lot of money in my opinion. They’re kind of holding all of these beautiful areas sort of hostage, which I don’t think is quite right.

Monument. Fuckin’. Valley.

This is living life, dude. To not do this is wrong.

America is a great country.

I’ll be a monkey’s uncle if that don’t look like Shiprock!

(rock formation in background)

Is that Shiprock?

I’d look it up but my phone doesn’t have any service right now.

The hell is that? Looks like somethin’. Damn dude, look how gorgeous this is.

It’s crazy gorgeous.

So I got here to the campground in Arizona and there’s no service on my phone. It’s just too remote up here. If I don’t have a cell phone signal then I can’t work or do anything.

One thing I’ve learned about myself already is that I’m not the type to go into the remote areas. That ain’t really my jam. If there’s no phone service, I can’t do it. It’s just that simple.

Posted on

Colorado Hotel Got Me Shook

(April 7, 2019)

Video Transcript:

Single, solo female travelers, it’s like you’re better off risking your fucking life boondocking/camping than staying in a hotel. Seriously. Staying in a hotel is an ass-reaming of Biblical proportions. It’s like I said, this shit is coming to an end.

Pretty much, hotels just need to be rented. They needed to be fitted with a miniature kitchen, and all hotels across the nation just need to be mini apartments. It would house like a ton of people. For pretty cheap. Because this is a thing of the past, this is not gonna be happening for much longer.

People are gonna go mobile. And there’s gonna be a culture and a whole entire infrastructure around living mobilly. Rest areas. That’s where people will live. That’s where people will park it and sleep. And it’ll still be free, but I think it wouldn’t hurt to put in a pay option at these rest areas for people who wanna stay longer. Because max stay should only be 24 hours at a rest area, any longer than that would just be inviting people to come and stay there forever. You’ve gotten enforce those 24 limits strictly, and if you wanna stay longer, you could pay extra.

So now I’m gonna check for bedbugs because I dunno, I have thoughts about the hotel. It’s not bad, it’s just… it’s some weird shit. Trust me.

(Holds up ~RightHand Portable Power Station)

Here is my portable power station. I’ve gotta charge this before I head back out on the road. I used it to charge my rechargeable handwarmer power banks I used as footwarmers for the first night I was in the car, and they suck down a lot of battery.

I’m lookin’ to camp.

I have a history of staying in hotels, so it’d be silly to say that I wouldn’t do it again, obviously I will.

But I’m just not about the hotel life.

I’m so fuckin’ cold right now.

It’s fuckin’ freezing.

(Points camera at bathtub)

It’s a fuckin’ pube. It’s not my fuckin’ pube.

See this is what you get when you stay in a “cheap” hotel. Which isn’t even cheap.

It’s nicely done, it’s got nice floors. But dude, it’s like I’m hanging out with everybody else who’s staying in this hotel and they’re all tourists.

I can’t even talk out loud cuz it’s literally that bad, you can hear everything.

The beds are really nice, so that’s great.

This is like a unique experience that you have once because you have some karmic debt that you gotta spend a certain amount of time here.

I’m not flushing the toilet cuz it’s just too loud and I’m sure everyone can hear me pissing in it.

It’s just not up to par.

On a mission for water…

goes outside to car and back inside to hotel

That shit was crazy!

points camera out windows through curtains

Check it out. It’s weird shit, y’all.

Everybody’s all like, “Oh my God, you’re alone out there as a woman traveling!” Dude… I’M the creepy motherfucker that everybody’s warned you about. I mean, it’s me. That’s why I’m here, you know what I mean? Cuz I’m creepy.

And it’s not like a problem or anything, I’m not saying it’s a problem that I’m creepy or whatever but… creepy as shit.

Dude…

laughs

It’s like, does this door even lock? I feel like it literally doesn’t.

I cannot believe this.

Don’t get me started, cuz I will say some shit. And I don’t really have time for that. I gotta work.

Can you hear all the people talking? They’re like elderly tourist people. But the walls on this hotel are paper thin, and not only that but…

They have this shit hanging all over the walls.

Whenever somebody next door closes their door, it’s like this thunderous crash and boom dude.

It reminds me of that story…

Teena Marie was struck in the head by a large photo hanging on the wall above a hotel room bed. And it gave her seizures until she died like 10 years later. It literally ruined her life.

This hotel is somebody’s dream, it’s a great idea, but it’s got some serious flaws.

For that reason, I’m not gonna sleep with my head on this end of the bed, I’m gonna put the pillows at the end of the bed and sleep like that.

I feel like this place is giving me lice. And it’s not bed bugs, I checked for bed bugs. I’m tripping so fucking hard, and I’m starting to wonder like…

laughs

Is cannabis just like a really bad idea for me? I mean, I can take that. I don’t have a problem with that, whatever. But it’s just like…

I’m like fuckin’ trippin’ balls right now dude, thinkin’ there’s like bugs crawling on me and shit, that’s the God’s honest fuckin’ truth.

Fuck, y’all, I’m trippin’ hard dude and this is just not the place you wanna be in if you’re trippin’ hard, it’s just not. For some reason.

loud toilet flushes in another room

Listen to that shit!

laughs

And it’s like, how the fuck did it get good reviews on Google?

I’m whispering because you can hear everything, they might even be able to hear me whispering.

Legitimately so fucking tired and I better start getting to sleep RIGHT now, it’s like 10:30PM and I need to start getting to sleep because these people are gonna be making noise in the middle of the night, getting up at like 6 in the morning.

This fucking sucks. And I do have work to get done while being here, but I’m just appalled by how much this fucking sucks.

Think about if you lived in apartment and this was just how it was, like you could hear everything, other people’s conversations and everything.

I’ve been listening to these people next door and I can hear their entire conversations and everything.

sighs

I would much rather be in a rest area right now, in my car. Any day of the week, ever in life.

We just need more rest areas and we need more parking in rest areas that already exist, and we’ll be well on our way to advancing as a mobile culture. It’s great. I will not miss hotels.

Once this infrastructure is in full swing, nobody will ever stay in a hotel. Ever.

It’s 4 fucking AM and I can hear the people in the next room snoring.

There’s literally nothing I fucking hate worse. I mean there are a lot of things I hate worse or just as much but…

It’s just weird.

facepalm

(Now in car)

Can’t find my keys. I mean I have other keys obviously, but that’s not the point is it? They’re in here somewhere.

(Finds keys)

hard exhale

Okay.

It was like…

Fuckin’ weird. It was like fucked up.

It had a really nice bed, it had like a wood floor in the bathroom area.

The room itself wasn’t the problem, the problem was the paper thin walls.

When I checked in, I said I want 2 nights, and she tells me the rate is like $87 or something.

She totals it up and it’s like $240, and I’m just like how the fuck is that a thing?

I didn’t say anything, but I’m just like what happened there?

I just felt unsafe, the door didn’t lock on the room, it was never locked. The key doesn’t DO anything.

There was that, which was not great, but that wasn’t even that concerning to me.

What was concerning to me was my car because my car is what I actually care about.

I don’t care about being in a hotel room for a night, I care about my car because this is like my house.

It’s so obvious to me that you’re in way more danger staying at a hotel than you are just staying in your car. I mean, depending on the hotel and everything, but like… what is the benefit of staying in a hotel?

The whole time that I’m in a hotel, I just wanna be in my car. Sometimes it’s fun, don’t get me wrong. But I’m obsessed with my car, I’m obsessed with driving. That’s what I wanna do.

And my nose was like bloody and shit, just the one side of it when I woke up, cuz that room gave me a lowkey allergic reaction.

I was woken up by the people in the next room snoring… like synchronized snoring. It was like the snoring olympics or something.

Plus I was feeling screwed over by the price, cuz I’m not great at math but I’m pretty sure there was shit in there that was not quite right. It was squirrelly.

But I’m creeper. I let it slide in the moment, but then later, you know some shit gets worked out.

So I get up today and I’m like I’m not fucking staying here anymore. Cuz I flushed the toilet and the toilet hardly flushed, so I was like you know what, I’m the fuck out of here.

So I went up to the front desk and I told the guy…

Thank God it was a guy and not the person who checked me in.

I was like, “Dude, I’ve had an emergency of serious proportions come up and I can’t stay the other night.”

And so I was charged for one night, I have the receipt. Which this person who checked me in did not give me receipt. Fishy shit going on.

But the guy this morning made it all right. Because whatever the fuck went on there lastnight, I don’t think he’s in on it. He made it right and I paid for one night, $87 and that was that.

And diverging from that place specifically…

I get the feeling that hotels are like trafficking headquarters. Especially those that have those old school keys and are not high tech at all. It’d be really easy in certain places for those to just be trafficked, you know, somebody has the key to the room…

The door doesn’t lock anyway, let’s keep that in mind.

But if somebody had a key, they’d just come and traffick your ass. I think that’s what happens in hotels a lot of the time.

Yeah, I mean…

I would just stay in my car like all of the time. The literal only problem that ever exists is just like where to park. That’s it.

We need for this vehicle dwelling culture to take off so the infrastructure is maintained toward this effort.

This is not a “bad” place… I don’t think it was the whole area, it’s just that hotel is so bizarre.

It’s very pretty around here.

GPS giving directions

I’m like so shook.

It’s just hard for me.

talking back to GPS

I just wanna be in the car.

Posted on

Colorado Birthday Celebration

(April 7, 2019)

Video Transcript:

So I just made it in to my hotel. I came to Colorado so that I could have a birthday celebration because it’s my birthday in two days, or a day and a half.

I use this really cool thing called ~LectroFan. It’s just sort of like a white noise box. I’ve had this for five years almost. They do still make the LectroFan, but there’s a lot of different kinds of these out there now.

(Holds up bag of ~Nacho Cheese Doritos)

This is one of the things that Annie does in a hotel room. I envisioned this, and now here it is. This is the power of manifestation.

Don’t worry, I have more than Doritos to eat. I actually have these as well…

(Holds up ~Austin Cheddar Peanut Butter Crackers)

I also have some beans and some canned salmon in the car. So I’m good. I plan to eat a lot less, from now on really.

Just out of curiosity let’s go ahead and see how the Colorado drinking water.

Tastes tastes like absolutely nothing. Perfect.

Ooo, look, it’s raining.

Well, it’s fuckin’ amazeballs, that’s what it is.

(Strikes pose)

I had to fart. That’s what I do when I have to fart. The whole world stops, and I’m just like… workin’ it out.

(Holds up ~Mary Jane Salve)

So anyways did I finish what I was saying about this?

I’m gonna put it all over my body. All over it. Gonna apply it to my entire body.

(Holds up hotel cup with ~Yoohoo chocolate drink)

Cheers.

(Holds up ~Montauk Milk Chocolate cookies by Pepperidge Farm)

Mmmm, it’s good.

Alright so now that I’ve eaten a little bit, I think it’s time…

(Holds up Colorado chocolate peanut butter cup)

For some bliss!

giggles

I’m so stoked! This is so great, I love this place.

(Eats chocolate peanut butter cup)

Wow. Now that’s interesting.

I can’t even talk very loud cuz I just feel like they’re listening to me and I’m not even high yet.

I’m not even high yet and I already think they’re listening to me.

God, it’s not easy being me because of my severe like, mental problems.

laughs

Okay, I’ll be honest, in my opinion, I don’t have severe mental problems…

But I am weird.

As fuck.

Incredibly weird, so…

That’s not a mental problem though.

(Points camera to window)

Super gorgeous.

Anyways.

I don’t know if it’s the power of suggestion but I genuinely already feel wasted, and it’s been like 5 minutes.

I really need to take a shower right now, that’s what I’m gonna do.

I mean I’ve got a lot of this shit to eat, you know what I mean?

Oh my God, I definitely feel it working and it’s been like less than 15 minutes.

I can already feel my body beginning to become warmer and it’s not because I turned the heater on it. It’s like a deep warmth radiating throughout my body.

One thing I notice is that there’s not very much lighting in hotel rooms anymore. Like not just here, but everywhere. The lighting is just… horribad.

Throwing my socks and my underwear in the shower with me.

No, I’m not fuckin’ high, like not at all! What makes you think that!?

Fuckin’ water is cold-ish. Well, it’s warm but it’s not hot.

Lol, like the most confusing statement ever. Whatever.

Oh my God man, fucking Pantene dude. Ahhh. Shit.

It’s Pantene.

I’m always like mega paranoid in hotel showers because I always start thinking I hear somebody like banging on the door.

Like the hotel’s on fire or something, or I did something wrong, you know what I mean? Super paranoid. Always.

(Towels off from shower)

Vogue.

(Cleans ears with Q-tip)

Feels so good.

There’s no reason to get dressed.

That’s my fuckin’ creed in life.

laughs

Gonna bring my socks just cuz comfort zone. Living.

Looks like it rained a sunny day almost…

(Goes over to window naked, peaks out)

Oh gosh, I hope nobody saw me. Well, anyways.

I feel like I’m about to do something naughty, but that’s like totally not what’s going on here.

(Lathers body in Mary Jane Salve)

Oh my God this is the shit dude. I highly recommend rubbing your entire body with this stuff.

I’m like, rambling and making no fucking sense.

I’m so fuckin’ high right now.

(Stands beside heater blowing)

Oh my God it’s so warm. It’s good.

Colorado. It’s Good.™

There’s nothing to show on the camera here, except for like the bathroom. What’s going here?

Oh my God…

laughing fit

I think we need to like, wash my face or something, the fuck?

laughing fit

Hey. Do I look high?

I feel so fresh and clean, oh my God. It’s goooood.

That should be an ad for Colorado.

laughing fit

So it’s like 10:30 the next morning, and I’m still gettin’ high.

laughs

Oh my God, I literally haven’t even got out of bed or anything, I’m just laying here.

I’m actually really hungover to be honest.

So I think the only cure is more.

(Holds up Montauk cookies, eats)

unintelligible hungover moans, giggling

It’s fucking cold in here.

It’s literally not, but you know. Kind of cold.

What the fuck is the deal with this fucking camera?

laughs

It’s totally the camera and not just me.

Ain’t got very much milk left.

I ate most of the Doritos.

So I don’t wanna have to go back to the store.

I guess I could, but I really don’t want to.

One of the things I really like about Doritos is the fact that it makes your burps taste like you’ve been eating spaghetti which is one of my favorite foods, so. It’s just really good, to be honest.

This shirt is keeping me warm, otherwise I’d be cold as shit right now.

I’m tired of the cold. I wanna be warm…

(Shows t-shirt which says “Sriracha”)

Like hot sriracha sauce.

I try to leave hotels incredibly clean and like not much went on in here. I mean not much did go on in here, but you know.

I always get double beds because you might need extra pillows and you might need another bed.

In the past I used to use one bed to sleep in and the other one to eat in. Which is a really good idea, I really recommend doing that. I didn’t do that this time, I’m just eating in the one I’m sleeping in.

What I’m not really clear on is when I’m gonna take another shower.

It’s a really nice shower though. With the walls and stuff and it’s shiny. But it’s just so much effort and it’s not really that warm.

I just wanna find a place to camp where I can be beside a body of water, and just get in the body of water. I know that’s not really that warm either but you know, it’s gotta be better than just showers. So fucking boring. I’m so bored of just… showers, you know what I mean?

I’m so bored of walls and doors. I just feel like there’s gotta be another way to live. There’s gotta be another alternative to this. I feel like this way of living is passing away. Like decades from now people will be like, “Do you remember when people used to live in houses?”

And if I’m still around I’ll be one of those people who are like, “Yeah I remember living in houses.”

But I don’t think people will live in houses in the future, I think it’s gonna be mobile and way more individual space based.

I think that’s just the natural progression, that’s just the future, that’s just what’s gonna happen.

So I ordered a pizza just now, and some breadsticks.

Honestly, cannabis hangover is…

Not that fun for me right now.

I probably took 15MG yesterday (Colorado chocolate) so maybe that was too much.

But that’s just crazy…

It’s crazy how powerful it is.

I feel fucking rough, dude. I feel like shit.

And my head hurts. That’s the worst part about it.

(Holds up spatula selfie stick)

Spatula selfie stick with ~Velcro front and back. There’s Velcro on the back of all my cameras.

I think it’s good to have extra cameras, cuz I plan to do some kind of crazy shit and they might get destroyed or lost or dropped etc. So it’s good to have backups.

Just waiting for my pizza because I feel…

Fucking terrible today.

It’s just the headache that’s so shit. It’s like pure shit.

Genuinely I feel like I need to go to the desert and just lay there in the sun.

I feel like I need serious sun exposure.

Feel like I need heat.

~Pizza Hut!

Oh my God look, there’s a plate and everything. Cheese. Napkins. Breadsticks baby fuck yes, aw get in my fuckin’ face dude. Put it in me, seriously.

It’s about to be on.

Would you just look at it? Just look at this.

(Opens curtains)

There, that’s good enough.

Y’all…

You almost need like 2 days to recover from indulging.

Like after my first fricken night, I literally need to recover from that. Which is something I did not expect, and I certainly did not allot for needing time to recover from my recovery.

eats breadsticks and dipping sauce

It’s almost like needing a vacation from your vacation.

And it has me shook, okay, I’m legitimately kinda shook by that.

Cuz it’s like…

I don’t have time for that, you know what I mean?

I don’t like to stay in the same place for very long anyway, let alone spend time recovering from what I did there, you know what I mean?

holds pizza to camera

I wish I could share this pizza with you right now.

I don’t like the feeling of being hungover.

I mean, I came to imbibe so that I could feel better than I usually feel, but like unfortunately that’s not what happened.

(Points camera out window)

Let’s see what this can see.

There’s like an open garage down there, I don’t know what they’re doing.

That’s a nice little storage building though, you could totally live in that storage building. I mean, I would live in it. For a while.

But yeah dude, I dunno, I just feel fucked up, you know what I mean? Just ugh, shitty.

I mean look at my eyes, you can tell I look kinda fucked up.

I feel fucked up, so.

laughs

It’s interesting the way they run the (dispensary) stores and the things they say. It always seems like living the dream, until you do live it. And then… there’s still struggle.

You make the dream come true, then you start living it, and then you find out that there’s hardships. Like of course there are.

To be somebody who sells cannabis product, in a store! That’s like living the dream. Yet, there are still problems. Go figure.

I guess the idea behind life is to keep living the dream, cuz the dream changes. There are more dreams to live and they require going to other places.

This is the same with anything in life. There’s no reason to stay in one place. There just isn’t.